Feral Friday - Loaning Books

It’s Feral Friday! And we here at Book Nerd Reviews thought we would discuss a topic that really sends us feral.

This week, we’re talking about loaning our books out to others:

Kristy’s say:

Hmmm. Lending books is a tricky one. I love recommending books (funny that, considering I blog about them), especially ones that I am passionate about, and sometimes I do get the urge shove a book at someone and make them sit down and read it… but I also don’t want my books to get damaged.

I am very pedantic about my books – I like them to be in good condition. Even when I read a book, I do everything I can to avoid damaging them – I rarely break the spine of a paperback, I take the dust-jackets of hardcovers and I don’t put them down in places where things can get spilt on them.

There is nothing worse than lending a book to someone to only have it returned damaged. Getting a book back with battered covers, dog eared pages or unknown stains (I don’t even want to know what they could be from) drive me insane. I take great care of my books and I want people to do the same… I think that’s fair.

Some books that I have – either hard to find ones or ones with sentimental or monetary value, I will never let leave my house. Some I don’t even like other people touching (those are extremely rare books, and yes, they tend to be Laini Taylor ones).

So, I guess that lending books is assessed on an individual basis – depending on the book, and depending on the borrower. Some people are on my automatic yes or no list, as are some books.

And if I am borrowing a book from a friend, then I take even greater care than I do with my own! I know how I feel when someone damages one of my books, so I would never do that someone else.

But please, to all those out there: if you borrow a book from someone, please return it in the condition in which you got it… or if there has been some accidental damage (accidents do happen), then don’t brush it off – own up to it, apologise and maybe even offer to replace it. After all, the person who leant it to you gave it to you in good faith.

Melissa’s say:

I know I am not the only one out there who sometimes hesitates wanting to loan books out. Being a book lover - and I know you guys hear me on this - I take great pride in my book collection.

If I loan a book to you, it’s because I am just bursting at the seems to talk to you about it because it is THAT good. That’s usually the only time I will loan out my books. The only other time, is when I am lending them to other book lovers that I know I can trust to take care of them. That being said, I think I’ve loaned maybe 5 books in the last two years? One book got passed around to three different people (but since I bought it for $5 I wasn’t sad about this). And some books never find their way home.

How often have you loaned a book, or a DVD or a CD to a friend, and never got it back? They put you in that really awkward position where you feel like you’re constantly having to nag and remind them for your book back? I HATE that!

And with that being said, I don’t often loan my books out.

I am more than happy to recommend titles and authors to my friends, and truthfully, if they ask me if I can loan it to them my favourite answer is to say that I have it on ebook so I can’t lend it. And then I recommend they check out the library to see if they have it. That seems to be the safe answer. Am I a bad person for answering this way? Maybe. But at the same time, it’s less hassle when you have to beg for your book back. And yes, I know someone out there has my copy of Mockingjay on their shelf 18 months later still. I had to repurchase it after giving up on getting it back. :(

Maybe it’s because I feel pretty strongly about this, that I’m that person who will usually say no if you in turn offer to loan me your books. I feel like it’s a lot of responsibility making sure I don’t put any marks on your book, or crease the spine. I don’t mind if I do this to my own books, but I cringe at the thought of doing this to others. So there’s no double standards for me - I’ll nicely just jot down the title and author and find the book myself, but thank you for the offer.

We would really love your opinion on this topic - do you loan out your books to your friends? Or are you a bit like Kristy and I and are really protective of your precious books? Please let us know in your comments below!

What do you think?

  • Krystianna says:

    I tend to be half and half. I will loan my books out, though not all of them, such as ones that are signed or books that I LOVED so much. It really depends. Great discussion!

  • Carolyn says:

    I will only lend my books to people if they fit one of the following criteria

    1. Very close friends that I know will look after them
    2. My almost 100 year old grandmother who reads similar books and always looks after them
    3. They are books that I liked but either have 2 copies of or aren’t really that fussed about

    I lent my Evernight series to a woman at work a few years back and they were returned to me totally trashed. She didn’t even apologise or comment. I had to replace the entire set. I also lent another book to someone else I worked with and it took 3 months and me asking numerous times for the book to returned.

    I will always recommend great books to people and tell them where they can find them, but am very reluctant to loan mine out.

    • Melissa says:

      OMG you have my empathy on your Evernight series. Especially when they say nothing about it or don’t acknowledge it? It’s offensive to have your belongings disrespected and damaged like that I think. Fair enough if it’s accidental, but at least offer to replace them - I think that’s fair.
      Melissa recently posted…Feral Friday - Loaning BooksMy Profile

  • I enjoyed your post! I rarely loan books out anymore after getting a trilogy back seven years after I loaned the three books out: broken spines, food stains (I could see Cheetos fingerprints), dogeared pages…eek!

    • Melissa says:

      I am glad you enjoyed it Maria!! :)

      OMG.. grossed out by the Cheetos fingerprints… that would be enough for me to have to replace them. Can’t stand food marks on books… it’s worse when someone else has left food marks on them though. Something about it not being your own mess makes me cringe. lol
      Melissa recently posted…Feral Friday - Loaning BooksMy Profile

      • Maria says:

        Yeah, those books are no longer on my shelves. I try to make myself feel better about it by saying that my friend really like them, she read them on more than one occasion. I couldn’t look at them any more, but I would never throw them away, so I donated them and I hope that they are being well-loved by someone new.

  • I totally agree with this. I’m always protective with my books. As selfish as it may sound, I would only share my books with people who are as dedicated as I am to books. I’m scared to be heart broken in receiving my books back ruined. I remember my friend lend her book to another friend and it was returned with soda stain. Oh my heart breaks.

    Style Reader

  • Jesica says:

    Actually, the only time I’ve ever let anyone borrow my books has been this past year lol I am always so worried about my babies being out of the house! But my friends have proven trustworthy (as long as I remember to remove the book jacket beforehand!) Plus, I need more book lovers to chat with. I rarely find book lovers in my area so I have to create them XD

    • Melissa says:

      OH good idea about removing the book jacket! ;) I don’t own too many hardcovers, since paperbacks prove more popular in Australia, but of the ones I do own, that’s a really good idea. At least if the jackets in tact, it’s half the problem solved.

      I do know what you mean about wanting to share chats with others that have read and loved the same books though, I struggle with that offline. I hope that the books I recommend are read by friends - but I still try and encourage they find their own copy… LMAO

      That being said, I’ve loaned out my copy of Divergent a few times. It’s tattered now, but this is the book I picked up for $5 and I already own the ebook, so I was okay with this sacrafice. ;)
      Melissa recently posted…Feral Friday - Loaning BooksMy Profile

  • I’ve loan a book to a friend..ONCE though. It was a school book and she needed to read it because the test was the next day (procrastination tsk tsk) and she returned it with no damage :) My friends aren’t really book nerds so I don’t lend often and that’s good cause I don’t like lending my books xD

    Little Book Star

  • […] Kristy and Melissa @ Book Nerd Reviews discuss loaning books out to others. […]

  • I’m not selfish, but I don’t loan my books. The end. I’m very careful with my books and I like to have them in perfect condition. I like recommending books, but that it’s. But, now I think about it, my boyfriend is currently reading my copy from Insurgent. He rarely reads, so when he asked if he could read it, I practically threw it to him - haha. He knows my strange reading habits, so I know he takes care of it.

  • […] discussed love triangles & teams on August 23rd We discussed loaning books on August 16th And we discussed book covers changing mid series on August […]

  • Leave a Reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

    CommentLuv badge